WTF Hulk Hogan Sex Tape

So apparently a Hulk Hogan sex tape with (maybe) his bestie’s ex-wife was casually leaked and people are getting hot and bothered about it. Uhh, why?

His moustache makes it look like his nose is leaking. He shares a name with a man who turns green when angry and still manages to be the Hulk we’d be less willing to bang.

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But let us address the real issues here:

1. Does he or does he not keep the bandana during sex? Does he change it into a red lace bandana to set the mood for sexy-time?

2. You are Hulk Hogan. Despite being a proud member of the HOLY FUGLY club, some women are still desperate enough willing to sleep with you for fame, money or because they have a weird bleached asian hair fetish. Why would you go for the woman your BFF rejected? Fugly people stick together, so I assume your bro is maximum a 4. And he is not a rich, famous, non-green Hulk. And his ex-wife must be fugly too. If you’re gonna do a sex tape, do it with Scarlett Johansson please.

3. How did we find out about this?

Let us know your thoughts in the comments!

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7 Comments

  1. In response to 3): Well, I don’t know how you found out about it, but I found out about it from you. And I wished I hadn’t. Funny post! Good stuff.

    Reply
  2. I didn’t know where you were going with this, but I like where it ended up.

    Reply
  3. I’m kind of curious about the bandana too now… because if anyone is banging hulk hogan I’ve got to assume that they enjoy the look of it, and taking it off would kill the mood.

    Reply

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