Jelena Ristic Rant – Some Love for the Djoker

For those of you who have the pleasure of not knowing her, Jelena is tennis hottie Novak Djokovic’s girlfriend. For those who don’t know who Novak is, fuck you!

But I will say this: he is so cute he makes babies and puppies look like hemorrhoids. I will spare you the pain of having to look at a picture of hemorrhoids. So here is a pic of Djokovic with a dolphin:

But back to Jelena. There will be no pics of her. I hate her. Not only did she take my man, but what kind of name is Jelena? Sounds like a name for teen pseudo-celebrities Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez after they started dating and, as all celeb couples do, morphed into a blob.

That’s really all I can say about Jelena. I don’t spend time googling her. She makes me sick and I like to pretend I live in a universe where she doesn’t exist.

Who are YOUR celebrity crushes? Do they have significant others you mindlessly hate?

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